When you’re getting a strip club lap dance and you’re not sure what to do, you’ve probably got a lot of ideas and thoughts going through your head.
“What should I do with my hands?”
“Am I allowed to touch her?”
“Can you touch strippers? Should I ask her if I can touch her?”
We’re hoping that this article will shed some light on the things you can and can’t do in a strip club, especially when it comes to lap dance etiquette.
What is Appropriate During a Strip Club Lap Dance?
Lap dance etiquette and touching policy are hotly debated issues among not only strip club enthusiasts, but even gentlemen’s club owners and staff.
Each club will have its own general policy with regard to how much you can touch the girls. The answer will always come down to the girl, however, and what she’s comfortable with.
You can know what to expect coming into a strip club, and from there you’ll be able to sense the specific rules regarding lap dances from the girls and the hosts.
Can I Touch Strippers Freely?
The short answer is no. The longer answer is that strippers will allow you to do more with them depending on several factors, which you may or may not know.
This includes how friendly you are to them, how much money you have to spend, how respectful you are, and how presentable you are. This last point refers mostly to hygiene and grooming, and not to how attractive you are.
In short, you can touch strippers during a private dance if you have a general understanding of lap dance etiquette. And if you’re truly smooth, you can do a bit more than just touch. Your experience will ultimately depend on you.
Should I Ask Permission?
It’s never a bad idea to ask permission before you begin touching your lap dance provider. This opens up the girl to be friendly and feel comfortable around you. She’ll respect your candor.
On the other hand, if you like to leap before you step, it’s generally acceptable to make a small move and begin touching while waiting for compliance from the girl. If she doesn’t move your hand or slap it away, she’s generally alright with the action you just took.
Go slowly if you choose to pursue this strategy. We still prefer asking permission before advancing, as it’s the lap dance etiquette standard.
The Gentlemen’s Guide to Lap Dance Etiquette
We’ve boiled down the rules of getting a lap dance and touching strippers into thirteen of the most important pieces of etiquette. Lap Dances should be a blast, but without knowledge of lap dance etiquette you won’t know what rules you can bend, and which never to break.
We want you to get the most out of your private dances at the Las Vegas strip clubs. We hope you to give you a keen sense of what’s acceptable, what’s a gray area, and what’s a “hard no” in the world of strip club lap dances. No one wants to be caught off guard or looking aggressive to the girl, or even worse, being kicked out for the evening.
Here are our lap dance etiquette essentials. Brace yourselves.
1.) No Kissing
Do not ever try to kiss a girl for whatever reason, anywhere. While reading through interviews of things strippers have been through, a shocking number of them have stated that a lot of guys during lap dances will try to kiss them.
Why would you ever do this? Would you ever want strangers randomly kissing on you? Touching is a maybe if you get the girl’s permission, and she will let you know, but for the love of God don’t kiss the dancers. This comes in as the #1 lap dance etiquette rule, and basically is here to prevent you from getting kicked out.
2.) More Charm = More Touching
Don’t insult the dancers if they deny you or tell you something you don’t want to hear. It’s very common for dancers to deny a male’s request and then the male can become irate and angry. Booze never helps this problem either.
Patrons have been known to hurl obscene insults at the dancers for things refused during a lap dance: calling them unattractive, insulting their weight, ethnicity, or anything else they can think of. You should never be the guy doing this.
No one likes a conservative lap dance, but if you feel a girl is being too tight to you, then simply move on to the next. Every dancer has their own set of rules as do the clubs. If you ask permission for something and get denied, there’s never a reason to get visibly upset.
Much of what strippers initially say before a lap dance is shtick, but a little bit of charm and interest in her backstory can go a long way when things get down to business. Work you magic not your words.
3.) Tip Don’t Take
We can’t believe we have to mention this one, but never try to steal money from the girl. Some guys whether it’s through pure stupidity or having too many alcoholic beverages, think they can steal from the girls and get away with it. It’s more common than you might think, especially during lap dances when things are up front and close.
Guys will try to sneakily take back some of the money they’ve put in a girl’s waistband, bra or money that fell on the floor. Most of the time, the girls will notice and if they do, you’re in for a rough night. You’re stealing from her and she works hard for that money. Don’t think a stripper won’t chase you down in high heels.
This is a hopefully obvious rule of lap dance etiquette.
4.) Less Attitude, More Gratitude
Drop the cocky attitude. Girls see two main kinds of guys in strip clubs. The first guy they see are the average every day guys who are terrified of talking to half-naked beautiful girls. They’re there to comfort them and put them at ease so they’re more comfortable during a lap dance. Strippers help these guys enjoy the experience, and not have a panic attack.
The second type of guy that strippers see are the showboat guys filled with raging testosterone. They come in throwing money around acting like they’re the hottest things in the room. This behavior will usually be accompanied by extravagant lies about their lineage and status (and also bad lap dance etiquette).
It’s not attractive and it won’t make the girl want to sleep with you or do anything else with you. A stripper can see through the act faster than most girls, and can identify a real baller from a fake one quite easily. It’s her job to do so. She’ll always prefer to stick to her customers that don’t act like idiots.
5.) Know the Costs
Know what you want and know the price of dances at the strip club before you approach a girl. This is a subtle part of lap dance etiquette. Fumbling around with your wallet and trying to figure out how much a dance costs can be embarrassing. It’s also a turn off.
So is asking the girl how much it costs, or what a reasonable tip is. An average lap dance is $20 in Las Vegas, and across America. A standard tip for a single song length dance is $5-10. More generosity than that is always appreciated.
It’s best if you have money in hand when you’re approaching a girl and asking her for a lap dance. If she says no, move on to another girl or wait for a girl to come to you. As long as you look presentable, the dancers will usually approach you and ask if you’d like a lap dance.
6.) Don’t Flash Cash
Be a gentleman, not a wannabe player during your lap dance. Some guys try to pretend like they’re players during a lap dance and it’s actually a turn off. These guys think it increases their chance to get some extra action from the girl if they flash they’re wad of hundreds like a piece of meat.
Ever heard the expression “all bark and no bite”? Usually this means they have no intention of spending a fortune. But still, they often do.
When dancers identify a guy like that, they try to suck every single penny out of him that they can until he’s scrambling around the club trying to max out his credit cards because he ran out of cash. They’ll tease him without giving him the type of play a real man deserves.
7.) But Stash Cash
Speaking of cash, have a lot of cash handy. If you don’t have a lot of cash handy, you’ll end up having to go to the ATM. In case you’ve never had to visit one (god bless), you should know that ATMs in Las Vegas charge an absurd amount in fees.
If you make multiple withdrawals a night, it’s not uncommon for your total fees alone to be $100 or more ($10-15 for each withdrawal plus your own bank’s fees). Some strip club ATMs charge as high as $20-30 per withdrawal. Simply make sure you come with plenty of cash and know what you want beforehand. Careless spending in Las Vegas is how people go broke, especially during lap dances.
8.) Memory Lane
Don’t tell the dancers that they remind you of someone you know or once knew. Not this girl from your high school, nor your ex-girlfriend. They’ve heard it a million times and its a complete turn off. It only goes to prove that its your first time at the strip club.
This one is rather shocking but it’s apparently not uncommon for older men to tell dancers during a private lap dance that the girls look like a sibling or family member. We’re not sure how anyone would think that line would work, or if it’s something people say purely out of being nervous, but just simply never say that. A line like that is not just bad lap dance etiquette, it’s just plain creepy. Especially during a one-on-one, private lap dance.
9.) Give Her Something to Smell
And by that we mean something pleasant. Make sure you’re wearing deodorant and cologne.
Just because you can’t typically smell your own stench doesn’t mean people around you can’t. Your smell carries a lot further than you think it does and if you stink, the dancer’s definitely going to smell it. Even worse, they’re going to tell the rest of the dancers about the smelly guy and make sure they avoid doing a dance for him. This tip also falls under general strip club etiquette.
Give her something amazing to smell. She will be all the more inclined to lean in or make mention of it. You may even get a tasteful lick.
10.) Let’s Get Weird
Don’t bring up any kind of fetishes during a private lap dance unless you’re willing to pay more for that fetish. We’re talking about small, innocent requests more than full blown, complicated fantasies.
Most girls don’t want to engage in fetish play with random strangers while they’re giving a lap dance. Depending on how weird it is, she might do it for a little extra gratuity. You’ll decide on that number during the dance. Girls hear about guys’ weird fetishes all the time, so you’re definitely not saying something she’s never heard before. Unless you have one that’s truly bizarre. Maybe you should respect lap dance etiquette and keep the weirdest stuff to yourself.
11.) Check Yourself
Let the dancer know if you’re going to release yourself while she’s dancing on you. No dancer wants to be dancing and all of a sudden feel your man juice on her through your soaked pants.
We know how embarrassing it is for you, but it’ll be even more embarrassing if she sits down in it and gets angry with you. If you have this problem, you probably should learn some physical self control before going to a strip club and getting a lap dance in general. Don’t be the guy that everyone remembers as the guy who literally couldn’t keep it in his pants: the one minute man. Always warn the dancer to stop if you feel you’re about to release.
12.) Forge a Connection
Remember that these girls aren’t just sexual objects. Some are insanely attractive, yes. They’re beautiful and they make money by grinding on you, dry humping you, and putting their hands on you.
It could surprise you that a lot of strippers in interviews have said that men look at them like they’re nothing, especially during a lap dance. Remember that these girls are mothers and daughters. They have family, they have a life outside of the club, and this is simply a job for them. Try to treat them with the same respect that you want them to treat you with.
You can also take advantage of this when you want to get closer to a particular dancer. Get to know her a bit more, and be sincere about it. Ask her about where she’s from, what her hobbies are, and other light questions. Don’t be too prying or ask anything personal. And never say anything to insinuate that you look down on her or her profession.
13.) But Don’t Catch Feelings
Don’t confess your love for a random girl giving you a lap dance. This happens a lot and it’s embarrassing for everyone involved.
You have to realize and understand, you’re simply a customer. You’re nothing more and nothing less at the outset. You’re just another customer and a tip at the end of the night. These dancers will treat you with respect, but if you worship them and fall in love with them, you’re setting yourself up for major disappointment.
Most of these girls are also usually taken or in committed relationships, so you shouldn’t ever feel entitled to a relationship with one of these girls.
Simplifying Lap Dance Etiquette
Okay, we know this is a lot of information. Its probably more than you ever needed to know about this topic.
The good part is that you know exactly how it works the next time you get asked for a private dance. And if you see that girl in the corner you want to ask, you’ll know how to approach the situation and the cues to give her.
Never be afraid of messing up during a lap dance. Even if you were to get reprimanded, its very hard to get kicked out.
If you have any further questions about any of the strip clubs we offer, or etiquette in Las Vegas and elsewhere, please feel free to text or call us at 702-755-1766. We’re happy to help guide you in the right direction.
Enjoy and stay classy, my friends.